Thursday, 6 May 2010

This time of year

This time of year looks nice. It's sunny and all that, sure. But I have a new appreciation for something new, probably exclusive to my room. At around 7pm, the sky turns really blue to the point where it gives things a tint, and it comes in through my window and looks nice. I also turn on my lamp (cos it's a little dark) and then the yellow mixes with the blue and yeah. Then I play guitar. This has pretty much been my routine for this week, and it's pretty enjoyable. Atmosphere does make a difference.

Despite this, this time of the year always saddens me... I have a longing for it to keep going on. The thing is, I constantly feel like I have unfinished business. I feel like I haven't done what I should have where I am, I feel like I haven't done what I should have with who I'm with. And to have it be forced away from you, man, it upsets me. It's like giving up on a painting you've been tweaking for the past 4 years, or something. I'm not sure how long it would take with me staying where I am to feel like I've done all I can; maybe it'd never come. Maybe it's just something about the way my mind works that prevents me from moving away from things easily.

But sometimes it's good to just step back and call it a day. Or a year, or 4.

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