Friday, 2 May 2008

Weird Thing about this School

A weird thing about this school for me, is that as it approaches the final days, I just get more and more depressed. The last day of my former secondary school was by far the best day I had there. It was awesome, mainly because I felt special because I was leaving. We went to the park and did things and eat food and stayed there 'til it was dark and went home. That sounds kinda lame, but yeah, it's mainly the special treatment you get when you're one of the only people leaving. I got a shirt signed by 60 people and everything. I don't really know what I'm writing about as of now...

Ok, where was I? Oh Last day of primary school was also incredible, I felt like I had all the best friends in the world. Now I talk to only 2 of those people; one of them is one of my best friends (though after spending years away apart from occasional visits, we really have both completely changed from each other), and the other goes to my school now, though I don't actually talk to her much, if at all. I used to hang out with loads more of my primary school friends, but they've all turned into horrible chavs with gangs that go around mugging people...or I just don't see them anymore.

The last day of year 10 (at this school) was horrible for me and I don't know why. Well, I think it was because I'd completely distanced myself from loads of people I used to know. It's like...I have to try and keep relations up, otherwise within weeks they fall apart. How crappy is that? How you have to try to stay friends with someone. This happens all the time, I'm gonna see all the friends I've stuck with:

Primary School:

Virtually no one, except a very cool guy called Jamil. But y'know, even then, I only see him about twice a year.

Secondary School:

Oran and Luke come to mine regularly, but I don't speak to anyone else. I speak to Alec occasionally on msn, sometimes Josh, but that's it. I'm only gonna count 2.

So that's 3 friends I have from other places, that I stay in contact with (as in seeing them face to face). That's seriously not much at all, especially considering how many friends I had while I was in those schools.

I predict that by the time I leave this school, my friends will include:

  • Anthony
  • Micah
  • Christian
  • Zak
  • Liam
And no one else. The thing is though, I can imagine that list being narrowed down to just Zak, because he lives incredibly close to me which is awesome. I also think I'd see Anthony a lot; he lives far away but he's my best friend so I'm not gonna just stop seeing him. I think I'll probably still see Christian, Liam, and Micah, but I also thought that about Alec, Josh, Joanne, Leo etc and I don't see any of them. Weird.

This whole blog is a joke, btw. I'm pretending that I'm mad about this, when I'm not. I don't care about who I see, if I'll "drift away from my precious friends" or whatever the hell I'm talking about now. I'm still mad about that thing that I refuse to mention (though the theme seems obvious), but I don't actually want to write about that, so I wrote about this instead. I don't really care about everything I've wrote up there ^^^, though I am more sad at the end of this year than my previous years, and I do miss my old friends that I don't see.



Ok, so it turns out that everything I wrote isn't a joke, it does sadden me actually, but y'know. I'm not as sad about it as I pretended I was, I'm trying to justify my sadness by pretending to be EXTRA sad about something big, like having not many friends from old places, but really I'm just sad that I didn't get a fuckin' hug. This is why I'm so vague, because that's one of the reasons for my anger and it just makes my whole blog seem pathetic. Oops.

But really, I'd love a hug any time soon. I haven't had one at all for about 3 weeks, and it's getting annoying. I also haven't had a serious conversation (that isn't just jokes) in a long time, except with Zak, but it was short and not much was discussed. All I could think about was how I was cold, also. That was fun though, trying to get home for an hour at 11pm is quite fun when you're with someone you know.

So yeah...other things...

I think I'm going to fail my ICT GCSE. By "think" I mean "know", but it's the only thing I'm going to fail. I hope I get an A in maths, and I want to get an A in english also. I'm also pretty confident that I'm gonna get a distinction in art, which is basically 4 GCSEs of A* which is awesome. Yeah. Work is hard as of now, and I'm mega stressed, but work is only 10% of that stress. I'm coping pretty well.

I have £400 saved up, and I feel like I should buy something. Not sure what though; maybe a good microphone that makes my voice sound like velvet; maybe a tablet? I'm not sure. I don't want to spend much because I don't like spending money because I feel like I could have bought something much more important for cheaper etc. Yeah. Maybe GTA4 lolololol. Everyone's going crazy for that game, and it looks awesome, but there's something about GTA that has never appealed to me. I think I need my games to be more imaginative than as real as possible. I'm not slagging off GTA here, the games are great, just not my thing. I'll be getting GTA4 though.

And here I am, talking about GTA. This probably means I've gone on too long. Anthony keeps bugging me to go on the phone, hopefully he's gonna tell me that I can go to his house tomorrow and stay the night. I kinda really, really, wanna get away from here for a little bit.

This is my longest blog yet. This is smashing.


Anthony said...

We have serious conversations all the time, like about periods and stuff! Plus, maybe you should get a ps3, then I can maybe, and then we can play GTA 4 online. I have 350 pounds at the moment, we can be money buddies!

PLUS , I hope you get a hug sometime soon.

oran said...

yeah GTA IV! That's an excellent game you SHOULD get asap because it ties in with your blog. there's a relationship system you have to keep with your friends

e.g. going to a strip club with your cousin :P

liam said...

eh wunhappi i lick your blogs alot dey are good. and YES im on your friends thing in the blog.

vote dj

Anonymous said...

see i think that i will not see my freind that oftern as well and i am frightened that you will be the only freind that i see after school appart from the stiner crw which consists of me freg, my freind brook ect although i may see liam and jhon as well because they live near brook and ferg.

from zak

christian said...

Esta muy verdad. Ok I'll talk in English now. What you've said is true. I keep in touch with only three people from my old school. Then again they were all bastards.